A 'How to' guide to achieve spectacular intensity
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There are many therapists and other experts in the field of human sexuality who will insist that you are unlikely to be sexually healthy unless you are comfortable and skilled with masturbation. It is a fact that most males think they know everything there is to know about this particular form of sexual activity - but it is also a fact that most of them do not. It is true to say that most men are capable of far more erotic pleasure than they even realise exists, in most cases.
Here is a set of 'how to' instructions almost guaranteed to produce greater highs of sexual pleasure that you have previously experienced - unless you are already an expert:
- Probably, the most important thing is to learn how to take your time. Males tend to masturbate furtively at first, anxious about family members - especially their mother - discovering what they are doing. Then there is the problem of disguising or getting rid of the 'evidence' of their behaviourů so for this reason, a habit of doing it quickly in the bathroom or lavatory can easily be established. So make sure you have time and privacy, where you can take as long as you like without fear of being discovered.
- Learn to not rely on pornography; not that there is anything wrong with it but it can take your mind outside your own body. This is not to say that you should never use porn; only that sometimes there can be a far greater intensity without it as you concentrate on your own responses.
- Notice what your body does instinctively; notice the changes in your breathing, what happens to your face muscles; notice how long it takes from the beginning of awareness of impending ejaculation to when it actually happens; observe how many ejaculatory pulses you experience, how long they last, if there is ejaculate on each pulse or if there are some 'dry' pulses at the beginning and/or end of the climax.
- Most males never change the way they masturbate, or at least make only minor changes. There is also sometimes a self-consciousness about whether something is ok or not, or if it might not be 'what men are supposed to do' or could be considered 'weird' or 'perverted'.
- Most males fantasise about an event or female bodies while they masturbate. For a change, try concentrating on the feelings in your own body - this is what females tend to do and they can sometimes achieve a higher intensity of climax than any male ever will.
- Some males believe that it is somehow a sign of inferiority or weakness to masturbate - hence the derogative expressions of speech that are often used as an insult (the most predominant in the UK being 'Wanker' of course). But the fact is that the greater the level of testosterone - in other words, the more 'masculine' a male is - the greater his sex urge will be and the more necessary it will be to masturbate on a fairly regular basis. For some men this will be daily even when they are in a relationship and/or when they are in their 'sixties' or even 'seventies'. For others it will be less frequent - but for most it is a healthy activity as long as they still have the urge and the strength.
- Explore your body. The testicles and scrotum are an enormously sensitive area that can be the source of great pleasure if you experiment, as is the perineum (the area between the back of the scrotum and the anus). A good technique is to encircle your scrotum at the top with your finger and thumb and pull gently downwards while you are masturbating with your other hand - this can help you to find new sensations, but to delay ejaculation - and the longer you delay it the powerful it will be.
- Most men always use the same hand to masturbate - if this is you, try changing hands, though it's usually best to stay with the same hand that you start with throughout one session. Some individuals report that it feels almost as if they are being masturbated by somebody else when they use the less familiar hand.
- Try different positions; laying down feels totally different from sitting or standing up. It might feel a bit odd at first, even a bit ridiculous, but you might also notice some new sensations you had not previously experienced.
- Experiment with different hand speeds and pressures. Most males use the same technique of a rapid and firm stroke all the time, yet gentle stroking, especially on the underside of the shaft, can produce exquisitely erotic sensations. Some men find that pulling the skin of the shaft back as far as it will comfortably go and holding it for a few seconds is extremely pleasurable, though this seems to be more often the case with uncircumcised individuals.
- Allow your hips to move - many males inhibit this. You'll notice that thrusting movements feel quite different from rotating or wriggling movements. Let your moving hand make rhythmic contact with the pubis (pelvic area just above the shaft).
- Try as many different techniques and fantasise about as many different things as you wish. 'Mental porn' can be great, exploring whatever gives you the biggest boost - and it really doesn't matter what that is or what anybody else might think if they knew. It also doesn't matter what you've heard any other person say at any other time about something that you discover you like; it's not their penis, it's not their ejaculation and there is no right or wrong way to do it. Whatever turns you on is the right thing for you.
- There's no need to use only your hand - there are plenty of sex toys around, many of them specifically designed for male use, like the model vaginas that you will find via an internet search.
- Finally, the use of a lubricant of some sort is to be highly recommended - the sensations that this can create can be extremely gratifying. Baby oil/massage oil is good for this. It's not good for intercourse where you are wearing a condom, though, since it is not compatible with the latex.
© Copyright Terence Watts 2006